Introduction
Do you ever have self-critical thoughts? Perhaps you embarrassed yourself in front of coworkers or a friend. Perhaps you took a look at yourself in the mirror and were dissatisfied with what you saw.
Self-criticism, for whatever reason, is never productive. In fact, it does a lot of damage. Self-deprecation is harmful because it can lead you to believe the negative things you’re thinking.
The good news is that you can take action to stop being so hard on yourself. We’ll discuss the benefits of self-compassion and the steps necessary to implement it in this post.
Why you should stop beating yourself up.
You’re not perfect and that’s okay
Nobody is without their share of flaws. Realizing this is the first step toward healing from self-criticism. Please don’t be so hard on yourself if you’ve made some mistakes or feel like you’re not quite up to par. Just take the lessons you’ve learned and move on.
Beating yourself up is negative and counterproductive
Your self-criticism will only serve to lower your self-esteem. It’s a downward spiral that’s tough to escape from. In addition, it usually has the opposite of the intended effect. To give you an example, if you’re trying to lose weight, berating yourself for indulging in a piece of cake will only encourage you to give up and binge eat later.
Learn to accept and love yourself just the way you are
Accepting and loving yourself as you are is a great antidote to self-criticism. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t work on yourself if there are aspects of yourself that you don’t like. Still, take this as a reminder to cultivate an unconditional love for yourself by recognizing and appreciating your best attributes.
How to stop beating yourself up.
Be mindful of your thoughts and words
The first step in stopping the self-flagellation cycle is to become more self-aware. If you catch yourself thinking negatively about yourself, try switching your frame of reference. Say to yourself, “I’m doing my best” instead of “I’m such a loser.” The same goes for self-talk: be gentle. Use words like “challenged” or “unsure” when describing your level of competence instead of “stupid” or “dumb”.
Don’t compare yourself to others
Oftentimes, self-criticism stems from unfavorable comparisons with other people. Many of us have the “I-want-to-be-like-them” mentality when we see the achievements of others. Or we might look at someone else’s mistake and think, “I could never do that!” The truth is that we’re all on our own paths through life, each with our own special challenges and opportunities. To feel better about yourself, avoid the trap of comparing yourself to others. Instead, think about where you are and how you can get where you want to go.
Practice self-compassion
If you’re having a bad day or made a mistake, show yourself some kindness instead of condemnation. Confide in yourself as you would a close friend. It’s important to give yourself a break and realize that it’s normal to make blunders now and then. Try to be kind to yourself as you work to better yourself. The most crucial thing to keep in mind is that you, like every other human being, deserve to be loved and respected.
Conclusion
“So, how can you stop beating yourself up? Think before you speak, and speak before you think. Never judge yourself against anyone else. Most importantly, be kind to yourself. Master the art of loving and accepting yourself as you are. Keep in mind that it’s okay to be human and have flaws.”
